Elements of Style Blog

I’ve been working my butt off this week and even though I really shouldn’t have taken the afternoon off to see Eclipse, I simply HAD to before the holiday weekend rolled around. I told myself it was kind of “work” in the name of “blog research” to make myself feel less guilty.  I arrived at the theater frazzled with fingers flying over my Blackberry keyboard, but fully tricked out in my Team Edward baseball tee. In broad daylight. On a Thursday. If any of you happen to have thought I was “cool”, I completely proved you wrong yesterday- standing there on Tremont Street, a grown woman of 30 years wearing a shirt proclaiming her love for a 17 year old fiction vampire. Sometimes I even shake my head at myself in disgust.

My friend Sarah and I though by going at 3:30 we’d avoid the chatty, screaming teens- and we were wrooooong.  But despite the constant chatter behind us the movie totally rocked.  By far the best one yet. This director captured the vibe of the books better than any of the previous ones- with a little more depth and darkness and a lot more passion.  And he somehow managed to direct Kristen Stewart in a way that she seemed far less annoying and awkwardly awful than she did in New Moon.  I remember wanting to jump through the screen and throttle her if she did the huffing/pouting/lip biting thing one more time, but in this one I never got that feeling.  Her wig, however, was tragic and a smidge distracting. Actually, all the wigs/hair/makeup were distracting due to the stylists’ ridiculous heavy hand. It’s like “Okay, put down the white pace powder now. We get it. Their dead”.

But lets get down to it. Team Edward or Team Jacob?  Rob looked mighty fine in Eclipse (although he would look mighty fine in a garbage bag)- he even was able to pull off the skinny tie look without me balking, which is a feat. He makes a great Edward, physically,  and I find his restrained portrayal of the brooding vampire to be intriguing, but man do the teen girls LOVE them some Taylor Lautner! Homeboy comes on screen and it’s a deafening howl of hormones! I remember in the books not feeling a whole lot of pull from Jacob, but Taylor certainly adds a warmth, sweetness (and a heck of a six pack) to the character in a way that kind of (KIND OF) makes me partially Team Jacob.  His intensity in the film is really engaging and he makes Rob look a bit wimpy (physically and as an actor).  He makes you understand why Bella is having a hell of a hard time picking between the two fellas, although I agree with Sarah when she says she wants a t-shirt that says “Team Bella is a Whiny B*tch and Doesn’t Deserve Either One of Them”.  The love triangle story is compelling, and while I could do without the obvious “don’t have sex until your married” subplot/lecture, they made this film a bit sexier.  Well, as sexy as a PG-13 movie penned by a  Mormon for 13 year olds can get.

The plot moves really swiftly, sticks to the parameters of the book and the action scenes are good enough that I think guys might actually like the film and not be more inclined to get a root canal than take their girlfriends/wives to it. The newborn clan on vampires are great, especially the gorgeous fella playing Riley,  but I thought that Bryce Dallas Howard was miscast as Victoria. Her face is too wholesome and sweet to convey that her character is such a scary bad ass.  There are some cheesy parts (it’s Twilight after all), but I think I maybe only groaned once or twice- far less than the other movies.   I’m positive the teens behind us thought Sarah and I were lame old hags with our commentary like “Christ Edward, you’re a millionaire, get your undead butt down to Tiffany’s” when we see Bella’s engagement ring. But overall my expectations were surpassed and I really enjoyed it- even is my stressed out state.  I of course am going to go back for a second viewing with some other friends, and perhaps I’ll have a more interesting review then, but until then Eclipse get’s two big thumbs up from this Twihard!