It is time to fail.

As most of you have read recently, Erin has been personally having a rather tough couple of months. No small part of her trials have been her perfectionist tendencies butting up against not enough time in the day. I would wager that even for those of us who don’t think everything has to be perfect, we can all relate in some way to the feeling that failure or mistakes are not an option.

I have been blessed/cursed to have failed many times in some very major ways and have made more than my fair share of both large and small mistakes. Early on it was terrifying. At 15 I was kicked out of boarding school 3 months into my tenure. I am not sure if this was actually my first huge failure, but certainly one of my most memorable. I won’t go into the details surrounding it, but suffice it to say that I was wronged, actually in an attempt to do the right thing. Didn’t matter. I was still kicked out. The first one in a long line of cousins who went to a New England prep school to be kicked out. Guilty or not, the stigma was still there (even if Amanda Knox is completely innocent, will anyone ever look at her the same?).

Compound that situation with going back to North Carolina where my family was, entering mid-year into 10^th grade at a school where I didn’t know many people because it was a rival to where I went to Junior High, so I was a pretty angry kid. Kudos to my parents for not making it worse and completely supporting and believing me (when my dad flew up to collect me, he flew me back first class…looking back that was an incredible thing to do).

I continued to fail/make mistakes. Whether it was leaving college early, trying to run a North Carolina restaurant from Boston, getting married to the wrong person (Erin is my second and far and away best wife), or any number of things, I have failed, made mistakes and lived to tell the tale.

One might think that I would be deathly afraid to fail or make mistakes today. Not true. I am a better, stronger, more confident person because of them. Not being afraid to fail frees you to up to truly succeed. One cannot live life afraid or under a rock. Once you accept a failure or a mistake you can begin to realize that they are not in fact life threatening. Mistakes can be fixed, failures are not permanent. Not trying or indecision is the real threat to life. As I said in my first post, I don’t want to look back on life wondering what if.

Accepting mistakes as human nature, common and natural and not as a sign of weakness or ineptitude is easier said than done, but still doable. Failing and bouncing back is even harder. But who ever said life was easy or fair? Someone said what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. It is true. I am not suggesting wake up tomorrow with the intent to make a big mistake so you can learn, but simply to not be afraid to do so. It is kind of like jumping off the high dive. At first it is really scary…and then once you are in the pool, you jump out and run up the ladder to do it again. It is in fact not nearly as scary as it was in your head before you did it.

More flowers, and FAB votives from Luna Bazaar in ikat and bamboo trellis!

In the kitchen I used paper flowers from Luna Bazaar over the bar table and of course, had to but fun paper goods in matching schemes (love, LOVE the zebra napkins)

Wait, what is that on her cake, you ask? Amazingly enough, it’s the zipper front Jimmy Choo shoe that I blogged about a month or two ago! And hilariously enough I had chosen to wear my BCBG knock offs of that exact shoe that night! Karen at Babycakes made the cake for me, and now I KNOW she’s a true blog fan! What attention to detail!!!! I loved it! (And yes, my nickname, thanks to Andrew, is Frog. Long story…)

(guess I should have made time for pedicure)

Other signs people read your blog- when your presents arrive wrapped in the party theme colors! :)

Andrew gave a WONDERFUL toast that both made me laugh and cry…

I think everyone had a great time (I know I did, I was still recovering even yesterday)

You know I had to bust out some 30′s bling with a age appropriate tiara (with the lovely Audra of Looc and longtime friend Elyse)

I wore a fantastically comfortable Rebecca Taylor dress that I love (did not take a pic of the ensemble, but this shows the most of it…) The dress even has pockets (which every girl can appreciate) and will look cute belted with a cardigan come fall!

I don’t think I ever showed you my new West Elm rug…adds a graphic element to the living room…and the patio where the party was SUPPOSED to be (damn you New England weather)

My boys were SO well behaved.

But at one point Oliver needed a time out and was caught by a guest hiding amongst some pillows…they think it was because I emasculated him with a pink ribbon collar. :)

Tonight I celebrate AGAIN with Andrew at the Coldplay concert (third time this year, I think I may have a problem) and then again on my REAL birthday later this week. Thanks to Andrew and everyone who has already made this a great birthday! What a lucky gal….

They aren’t always funny, that’s for sure- but when you get home from a tough yoga class and go to grab your pint of Ben & Jerry’s out of the fridge (well deserved after all those Warrior 2′s) and find this note inside the carton instead of ice cream- you HAVE to laugh. And then put it on your blog. :)